Ex-Royal Butler Recalls the Friendship Kate Middleton and Prince Harry Once Had: ‘He Used To...’
Before the fractures, strained relationships, and eventual transatlantic exit that reshaped the royal family in every possible way, there was a lesser-talked-about but deeply warm bond that existed within the royal fold. While much focus has always been on the 'fab three' dynamic of Prince William, Kate Middleton, and Prince Harry, former royal butler Grant Harrold now reveals that the Princess of Wales shared a particularly close friendship with her brother-in-law, one that often played out outside of William’s company.
This revelation comes from former royal butler Grant Harrold, who served within the royal household and is now opening up about his years of service in his upcoming memoir, The Royal Butler: My Remarkable Life of Royal Service. In the book, Harrold recalls how Prince Harry was not the outsider he’s sometimes painted to be, but instead someone deeply integrated into the lives of his brother and sister-in-law. “[Prince William and Kate Middleton] involved him [Harry],” Harold writes in an excerpt published by The Telegraph. “He used to go out with Kate. William would be away, and Kate and Harry would be off doing stuff together.”
While the public often saw the three of them appear as a group, Harrold explains that Kate and Harry had a comfortable friendship of their own. “I think when people say, ‘Oh, he was left out,’ he really wasn’t. But also, he was with Chelsy,” he notes, referring to Harry’s long-time girlfriend, Chelsy Davy. “Chelsy was always around. And Chelsy and Kate got on really well.” Their outings weren’t particularly royal in nature. Harrold says the pair would “go shopping” and “go to pubs” together, normal pastimes that highlighted the relaxed and easy rapport between them.
That closeness was also on display at William and Kate’s 2011 wedding, where Harry served as best man. Royal expert Katie Nicholl later recounted in her book Harry: Life, Loss, and Love that his speech struck an emotional note, as per Marie Claire. “It was affectionate, warm, and funny, and touched William deeply,” Nicholl wrote. “When he said the couple’s decade-long romance was his inspiration, there was a shy smile from Chelsy, while Kate shed a tear.”
Even after relations between the brothers soured, Harry is said to have maintained a measure of his bond with Kate. In 2021, The Mail on Sunday reported that Harry personally texted her to share the news of daughter Lilibet’s birth, with a palace insider suggesting the move was meant as “cementing her role as a bridge between him and his brother.”
Today, that once-easy bond between Harry and the Waleses feels almost like a relic of the past. The rift between the brothers, in particular, has been described by royal commentators as far more challenging to repair than Harry’s fractured relationship with King Charles.
Royal expert Kristen Meinzer had earlier told Us Weekly, "I think that Harry’s relationship with his brother is a different beast than his relationship with his father. But perhaps if Charles warms more to Harry, William will feel compelled to follow his lead." Her comments followed reports of a “secret summit” between Harry’s private secretary, Meredith Maines, and Charles’s communications chief, Tobyn Andreae. The pair were even photographed with Liam Maguire, who oversees the Sussexes’ UK PR operations — fueling speculation about tentative “peace talks.”