5 Times Queen Elizabeth Made Prince Harry’s ‘Spare’ Status Impossible to Ignore

Being the “spare” may have been a running joke in the royal family, but for Prince Harry, it was a label that followed him long after childhood. He has spoken openly about what it felt like to always come second, and some of Queen Elizabeth’s most public decisions seemed to make that difference harder to miss. Looking back, these moments made it perfectly clear just how differently the Queen’s two grandsons were positioned within the monarchy.

One detail from Elizabeth’s 2019 Christmas message sparked much debate. As she delivered her annual address, portraits of Prince Philip, Charles and Camilla, and William, Kate and their children could be seen around her. However, Harry and Meghan Markle were missing from the display, despite a photo from their 2018 wedding featuring in the Queen’s Christmas broadcast just a year earlier. The incident came only weeks before the Sussexes announced their decision to step back as working royals. Christopher Andersen told Us Weekly, “I think that was hurtful [for him to see]. A friend of Harry’s told me that he felt that he was being erased in a sense from the family.” He continued, “I think that was one of the things that prompted them to issue the statement that they were stepping back from royal [life for a] full-time real life.”

When Harry arrived at Sandringham in January 2020, he expected to discuss what his and Markle’s future could look like after they had announced plans to step back from senior royal duties. Five options were put forward, with Option 1 meaning no change and Option 5 meaning a complete break from royal life. Harry chose Option 3, which he described as “half in, half out”, which allowed the couple to have their own jobs while still working in support of the Queen. But Harry said in his Netflix docuseries Harry & Meghan that his preferred arrangement “was not up for discussion or debate.” He shared, “It was terrifying to have my brother scream and shout at me, and my father say things that simply weren't true, and my grandmother quietly sit there and sort of take it all in.”

The split became even more official after Queen Elizabeth’s 12-month review of the couple’s new arrangement. In February 2021, the Queen stripped Harry of his honorary military appointments, including his role as Captain General of the Royal Marines and several other royal patronages. The Palace explained that because he was no longer returning as a working royal, he could not continue with the duties attached to those positions. For Harry, who had spent a decade in the military and served two tours in Afghanistan, the decision came as a devastating blow. Just days earlier, he had insisted that his decision to step back was not about abandoning service. As per Variety, he told James Corden, “It was never walking away. It was stepping back rather than stepping down.”

On another occasion, seating arrangements could quietly give away Harry's place within the Firm. Royal precedence determined where family members sat at formal events, with William’s place in the line of succession putting him ahead of Harry. At the 2019 Festival of Remembrance, William and Kate sat beside Queen Elizabeth in the front row, while Harry and Meghan were seated behind them. The arrangement offered a very visible reminder that William’s position as the future king came with a different place beside the monarch. But it wasn't just royal events. Seating arrangements at royal residences also routinely followed the strict hierarchy.

The difference between William and Harry was also hard to miss at Queen Elizabeth’s Platinum Jubilee in 2022. For the Trooping the Colour balcony appearance, the Palace announced that only working royals would join the Queen. William, Princess Kate and their children made the cut, while Harry and Meghan Markle were left out after stepping down from royal duties. Harry was still the Queen’s grandson and sixth in line to the throne, but his place in the monarchy had changed dramatically