5 Things Princess Kate Put Her Foot Down On Before Marrying William

Princess Kate may have stepped into a life of rules and protocols when she married Prince William in 2011, but that did not mean she was ready to give up every preference or boundary she had. Even before the wedding, there were moments when Kate stood her ground, whether it involved royal traditions, her relationship with William, or her own choices for the big day. Here are five things she seemingly refused to compromise on.

Kate was already setting boundaries over her place in the royal family long before she became Princess of Wales. In 2006, while she was still William’s girlfriend, she was invited to join the royals for Christmas at Sandringham. It was a significant invitation, especially because she was not yet engaged to William, but Kate reportedly decided she was not ready to step into that role just yet. Royal historian Robert Lacey later revealed in his book Battle of Brothers that Kate had made her position clear. According to The Independent, he wrote that Kate “would go to Sandringham on Christmas Day only when she was engaged and had a ring to prove it.”

Kate seemed to have a clear idea of how she wanted to approach royal life long before she fully settled into it. Unlike many outsiders who marry into the royal family and spend years adjusting to its traditions and hierarchy, she was determined to have a say in the role she would take on. As per Us Weekly, royal biographer Robert Jobson revealed in his book titled Catherine, The Princess of Wales that Kate “established some fundamental life rules that she would stick to when she joined The Firm. Her ‘terms’ were, in fact, presented to Queen Elizabeth and Prince Charles.” Jobson stressed, “She was clear from the outset that she would not be pigeonholed into carrying out particular duties. Her priority, she emphasized, would always be her family.”

Kate and William had already experienced the difficulties of being apart when their relationship came under strain in 2007. William was spending time at an army camp in Dorset while Kate remained in London, and the distance was among the factors reportedly linked to the pressure on their relationship. They eventually found their way back to each other, but William’s military career soon presented another potential test. After becoming a pilot, he was posted to RAF Valley in Anglesey in 2010. According to Entertainment Daily, Kate was not keen on returning to a long-distance relationship, and so she joined William. The couple settled into a farmhouse near his base, where they lived together before William popped the question that year.

Even before their wedding, William and Kate appeared to be keeping their home life more low-key than the traditional royal setup. A 2011 Los Angeles Times report noted that the couple had no servants in their home, including “no clothes valets, chefs or butlers.” That approach has continued years later at Forest Lodge; the couple still have no live-in staff, with their nanny and housekeeper living nearby instead.

Kate pushed back against royal expectations when it came to her wedding-day look. According to Marie Claire UK, by choosing to wear her hair down, she broke a roughly 350-year-old tradition of royal brides wearing their hair up. Royal commentator Ashley Pearson, in William & Kate: The Journey, said royal officials “indicated very strongly” that they wanted Kate to wear her hair up. “However, Kate had her heart set on wearing her hair down with long flowing curls, which is her favorite way to wear it, and actually William's favorite as well. They ended up compromising on her look,” Pearson continued. She also left the word “obey” out of her wedding vows, promising instead to “love, comfort, honor and keep” William.