Conflict Coach Reveals Harry’s Biggest Mistake in His Bid to Feel 'Validated': 'You Risk...'

Four years after stepping down as a working royal, Prince Harry has finally expressed his wish to reconcile with his family. In his BBC interview, the Duke of Sussex admitted his father, King Charles, refuses to speak to him. As the Prince allegedly caught the royal family off guard with the interview, a conflict coach told Hello! magazine that he has lost ‘control’ of the feud with such moves. The expert added that Harry's sit-down only made it more difficult to mend the rift.

Conflict expert Julie Cobalt threw light on the consequences of Harry’s explosive memoir Spare, through which he brought several private royal matters to the forefront. She said, “Publicly criticizing your family, especially in a memoir, virtually guarantees defensiveness and further distance. It also strips you of control over how your message is received.” Cobalt added that if Harry’s ultimate goal was reconciliation, he should have opted for a better strategy, such as consulting a conflict coach or a mediator. According to her, he should have focused on having an ‘honest conversation’ with his family, avoiding ‘public narration.’

For the unversed, in his latest interview, Harry claimed the royal family was behind him being stripped of his taxpayer-funded security. Despite the tension, he hoped for a reconciliation with his estranged family, especially his father, who is battling cancer. The Duke said, “I would love reconciliation with my family. There's no point continuing to fight anymore. Life is precious.” Reflecting on his statements, Cobalt argued that speaking in public about family matters only hinders ‘healing.’ “If your goal is healing, involving the public complicates the path.” She added, “You also risk misinterpretation. Photos, headlines, or quotes taken out of context can inflame things further.”

According to Cobalt, Harry and Meghan Markle’s interview with Oprah Winfrey in 2021 was also an effort to feel ‘validated.’ She said, “People often turn to a third party, whether it's a friend, neighbor, or social media, not just to vent but to be validated...That validation can be emotionally rewarding, especially when it reinforces a sense of being wronged. It's much easier to stay in the role of victim than to look inward and explore your own contribution to the problem.” Cobalt summed, “Public sharing can feel like control and clarity, but it often replaces resolution with reinforcement.”

Following the Duke's bombshell interview, experts have claimed that nobody in the royal family trusts Harry and Markle anymore. Instead, as per insiders, the feud has only grown worse. A source close to the family told Page Six, “Maybe there’s room to forgive, but they won’t forget. Forgiveness and trust are two different things.”