Princess Diana Reportedly ‘Froze Out’ Aides and Left Them ‘to Stew’ When Things Didn’t Go Her Way
Princess Diana was adored for her warmth and relatability, but above all because she was unmistakably human. And being human comes with complications. She wasn’t perfect, and never pretended to be; one of the reasons she is still remembered in modern history. Alongside her empathy and charisma, there were moments when she struggled with things not going her way, and she had her own way of handling them. Former Buckingham Palace press secretary Dickie Arbiter, who worked closely with her for several years, offers a candid glimpse into that side of the late Princess of Wales.
In his memoir On Duty with the Queen, Arbiter recalled the complexity of working with Diana, which apparently her two sons have inherited. “I had had a chance to get to know her, and in doing so began to understand the kind of person she was,” he wrote. “In a word, she was complicated. She was fine when things were going her way,” he explained. But when plans shifted, Diana had her own method of expressing displeasure, often withdrawing communication altogether.
“If anything out of the ordinary occurred, anything that conflicted with what she wanted to do, and in her way, then you were frozen out and left to stew until she decided to invite you back into the fold,” Arbiter wrote. These so-called 'freezes' could last days, sometimes even weeks, Arbiter revealed, and “no one was immune.” He himself found out the hard way after advising against an event Diana was determined to host.
Arbiter recalled suggesting that a reception for England’s football team wasn’t the best idea, given that the squad had just lost. Diana, however, wanted to press ahead with it. When he voiced his reservations, she cut off communications. “I didn’t hear from Diana again for the next two weeks,” he wrote. Eventually, Arbiter came to understand that these freezes weren’t necessarily personal, but part of Diana’s way of exerting control. “Over time, I learned not to take the freezes personally,” he admitted.
Arbiter added that Diana was one of the most engaging people he had ever worked with. “She was a true professional, warm, approachable, and incredibly charismatic,” he wrote. “Of charming the public, it was as if she’d been doing it all her life.” His first meeting with the Princess came just days before her 1981 wedding to then-Prince Charles, and he would go on to spend five years working closely with her. That proximity gave him not only a sense of her personality but also an appreciation of her unique ability to connect with the public.
“She was engaging and fun to be with,” Arbiter recalled. “She could light up a room, and she understood instinctively how to make people feel at ease.” Arbiter has often described Diana as both a ‘brilliant parent’ and an appreciative boss. In interviews, he also described William and Harry as her greatest legacy. “Diana’s legacy is William and Harry. That’s it, they’re carrying on her work,” he said, as per HELLO!.